‘Fat’ is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her.
I mean, is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I’m not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain…
I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn’t seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? ‘You’ve lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!’
‘Well,’ I said, slightly nonplussed, ‘the last time you saw me I’d just had a baby.’
What I felt like saying was, ‘I’ve produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren’t either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?’ But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!
I’ve got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don’t want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.
So, how many customers have you had in the past few days yelling at you because their ticket says The Desolation Of Smaug when they “explicitly asked to see The Hobbit”?
I worked in a cinema when the last two LOTR films came out and I know your pain all too well. After the first few shifts, you run out of polite ways to tell people that, being three separate films, they can’t all have the same title and just want to start headbutting these morons. How many ways are there to say, “sure, I can give you a refund and yes, you can absolutely repurchase your ticket from my colleague but I guarantee that he too will make the same ‘mistake’ I did and hand you a ticket for the ‘wrong’ film, you absolute shithead” ? I don’t know. But I do know that if you haven’t had a customer like this yet, they will come. Oh yes, they will come….
Just breathe through the stupidity, Tumblr. You’ll make it. *hugs*
I’m drunk and it’s my birthday. I said I didn’t want a fuss but for some stupid reason, I’m a little peeved that so many people forgot, (which makes no sense, I know.) I’m so glad I’ve lived this long, I love the life I have but at the same time, I’m somehow still so sad to be this age. I expected more from my 20s…at the very least, I thought I’d still have my looks! GAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!